Thursday, June 11, 2020

Day 48: Never Enough

Day 48 of #100DaysofHannah and #100DaystoOffload...

Where. Did. Today. Go.

The days hasn't felt particularly short, but nevertheless, it feels like I've accomplished relatively little.  In reality though, I've probably done more than it feels like.

In fact, I know I have.
Like spending 1.5 hours in neuro rounds
And another 1+ submitting/grading papers
With another 1+ working on random work-related projects
Followed by an hour of journal club (which I may have gotten distracted during due to the arrival of my audio interface... :)
And 3+ hours of lecture
After which I got back to troubleshooting my newest tech for another hour.
(Audio interface, mic, headphones, and cam are all functional - just in time for another Sibling Summit recording session tomorrow! So. Excited. Now just counting down the days 'til the midi arrives to complete the gig!)
Just in time to head into work to take care of 8 projects (2 more hours down!)
And pick up the next part of my flute surgery kit (aka cling wrap)
And troubleshoot an after hours patient call
And attempt Day 3 of minor flute surgery

Which brings me to now.

So why do I feel so unaccomplished?
Honestly, it's because I haven't done a solid workout or gone for a second or third walk/run today.
And, admittedly, it's sort of killing me.

Recently, it's been easy to fall back into the mindset of "it's never enough."
No matter how much I workout, how many steps I get, what I (don't) eat - it's never enough.

And while I'd love to blame it on COVID and quarantine, anyone who knows me well knows that this is really nothing new.  Could the hours by myself and increased temptation to eat and the previous time for excessive exercise probably play a role in this exacerbation? Sure.

But exacerbations can only occur in the context of pre-existing disease.

A disease of which self love, acceptance, and forgiveness are the only cure.

It sounds so simple.
No formulas. No equations. No numbers.
Just three words...

You. Are. Enough.

'Til tomorrow,
-Hannah

Song of the Day: Never Enough
Question of the Day: What would you do if you knew you wouldn't fail?
Challenge of the Day: Believe you are enough.
Photo of the Day:

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